August 26, 2010
August 25, 2010
August 24, 2010
Schemes
I always know when a scheme is a-brewin’.
Today, it started with Monkey in the Middle coming to me and asking how much a soda costs.
About 5 minutes later, he came back, wondering if milk is sold individually, like a 20 oz bottle of soda.
Then, he wanted to know if water and milk would cost the same as soda.
Finally, I asked.
Turns out, he and his siblings want to open a store at the end of the driveway that sells water, milk and soda.
Very enterprising.
Then, he comes back and asks if you can buy a bouncy castle for your house.
I tell him I guess so.
He wants to know how much they cost.
About $5, was his guess.
I said, probably a few hundred.
He was not defeated.
Next thing I know, I hear change being dumped and now I have to know, so I go into the living room.
After they pooled and counted their money, they started asking what extra chores they could do.
I decided to not ask the hard questions right now.
Like, where exactly they think a bouncy castle will fit in the house.
How they plan on blowing that thing up.
And the rest.
Instead, I’ll let them plan and scheme.
Because tomorrow, it’ll be something else.
August 22, 2010
Story Time Sunday
So, my camera appears to be broken, which is devastating, as I have so many pictures on there that I wanted to share with you.
Real Man is working on getting the photos downloaded, even though the darn thing won’t turn on, and so in the mean time, I’ve decided to entertain you with a story from my past.
When I graduated from college, I lived at home for a period of some months before moving into my own place.
The summer right after I graduated, I got a job at a local stationery store and Real Man was working at the local road department.
We also started dating (again) that summer.
So, one day, Real Man called me at my parents house.
I answered the phone, in my room and said, “Hi!”
He replied, “Hi!”
But then, my mother picked up the extension downstairs, because our intense “Hi” conversation hadn’t taken more than a second and she said, “Hello?” thinking she was the first person to answer the phone.
Real Man didn’t say a thing.
See, he expected me to say “Mom, I got it.”
Because, that’s what a normal person would do.
That’s what a polite person would do.
That’s what a person who wasn’t an only child with an overactive imagination who had spent WAY too many hours entertaining herself and coming up with plans and schemes would have done.
Yet, that’s NOT what I did.
Instead, I put on my best Brooklyn accent, lowered my voice a few octaves and said, “Mrs. Lawrence?”
My Mom said, “Yes?”
I said, “This is Joe from VW credit. I’m calling to set a time to come over and repossess your car.”
“What???”
“Yeah, I need to come over and repossess your car.”
My Mother was stunned.
“But, but…my husband pays that bill every month! I don’t understand!”
“Well, I guess he ain’t as on top of it as you think he is, huh?”
My Mom was yelling and trying to convince me to not repossess the car and I kept explaining that I didn’t deal with the finance end of things. Finance gave me her number and I had to come and get the car.
When she finally started saying things like, “But…my car!….my baby!” I decided it was time to let her off the hook.
“Ma?” I said, in my own voice.
“Amy, hang up the phone,” she said, thinking I had picked up the extension.
“No, Mom…it’s me.”
“What?”
“It’s me Mom…I’m Joe from VW credit.”
“What?”
I put the Joe voice back on, said a few words, then said, “See? Me!”
Silence.
Then, I heard her extension hang up.
Real Man simply said, “You are terrible.”
I said, “I know.”
I didn’t smoke.
I didn’t drink.
I didn’t do drugs.
But, I did have a penchant for the hijinks.
Still do.
I’d like to say that was the last time I ever pranked my parents, particularly with the phone.
I’d like to say that.
Can’t.
If the camera doesn’t get fixed today, perhaps you’ll hear another story.
Cuz, the truth is, this ain’t the worst of it, folks.
Love you, Mom and Dad! 🙂
August 21, 2010
Carnival Games
“Mama! Mama!” the boys called to me the other day.
“You have to come see our cool carnival game!”
The boys love playing carnival, boardwalk, block party, etc.
Anything where they can invent rides and games and then play for hours.
So, I finished up the bill I was paying, put it in the envelope, stuck on the stamp, and walked out the front door.
Where I promptly let the bill drop out of my lifeless hand, as I saw the carnival game the boys had made up.
They were tossing little rubber balls into our garbage and recycling cans.
Some of which actually had garbage in them.
Those that were empty still had the remnants of garbage days past.
All of them…gross.
Needless to say, I hauled everyone inside for a bath (you can see Baby Monkey’s hands on his hips, as I took this picture after telling them that this carnival was shut down) and we discussed the possibility of using sand buckets from the beach instead of garbage cans next time.
While I celebrate their creativity…
…I shudder to imagine what these boys will think of next!
(Let me clarify that this picture was taken the same day as the lawn mowing day…the boys have not been wearing these clothes for three days.)
August 20, 2010
Little Bit of Money, Lots and Lots of Fun
So, I was in the store the other day and they were selling Squirmles.
Squirmles are these little fuzzy things attached to strings.
Not much of a toy, when you think about it.
However, I bought three because I’ve got kids who play with cardboard boxes, so something that is cheap and not much of a toy would probably be a big hit around here.
I was right.
They’ve gotten hours of entertainment out of these things.
They’ve made obstacle courses, wound them around bannisters and cabinet handles.
They stick them in their pockets and treat them like little pets.
$2.99 for a set of a big and a little.
Not to be cliche, but the hours of entertainment?
Priceless.
August 19, 2010
Pot ‘O Gold
Monkey in the Middle had football last night.
It didn’t end until 7:30 and we hadn’t eaten beforehand, so we took the Monkeys to Wendy’s for dinner.
As we got out of the car, this is what we saw.
And it felt so appropriate, because according to the picture, at the end of that rainbow was my pot ‘o gold.
Those monkeys.
August 18, 2010
Mowing the Lawn
Ah, I’m so glad the boys are finally of an age where they can mow the lawn.
Real Man is glad, too, because it means that he doesn’t have to spend his weekends doing lawn care.
The boys have already taken care of it during the week.
I know, I know…
…some of you may think they are a little young to handle a lawnmower, but I say, start ’em young!
And, they love it.
They spend hours in the yard, mowing away, calling me out to check their progress.
It really warms a mother’s heart.
Sure, sure…
…their lawnmowers aren’t really traditional.
And yes, not a blade of grass actually gets any shorter.
But, c’mon…
…you gotta admire their work ethic.
August 17, 2010
Catching Up
We’ve been busy.
And while our general business could have been fodder for several blog posts, I’ve been too busy to write them.
For example, I could have written an entire post about the frustration of Back to School shopping when all of the clothes that are out there for 9 year old girls are skinny jeans and short, short skirts.
Disgusting and heartbreaking, particularly if you are the Mom of a beautiful, sweet little girl who doesn’t quite fit that body mold.
Or, I could have written a blog post about the game of t-ball the boys and I attempted in the backyard, only to have to call it due to being pelted with acorns from the trees.
We couldn’t see them, but we are sure that the squirrels were actually throwing them at us.
They were coming down that hard.
There’s also the blog post I could have written about taco night, when I decided to make tacos (for the first time) and the kids were thrilled, and so I made two pounds of taco meat.
The boys decided to just have cheese tacos.
What’s that?
Oh, just the shredded cheese in their shells.
The photo of the 1.5 pounds of taco seasoned meat still in my fridge would have made a good image.
Perhaps you’d have enjoyed yesterdays blog post about Monkey Girl’s first day of Girl Scout camp.
She’s in love with camp.
She’s in love with life.
I’m in love with her.
Finally, I could have written about my impromptu trip into NYC with Erin where we did nothing really…shopped at Bloomingdale’s and saw Eat, Pray, Love at the beautiful, old Ziegfeld Theater, and then met Kim and Michaela for dinner at HK…a fantastic restaurant with a fantastic waiter.
But, I’m not sure I could have captured the laughter and joy that comes from spending the day with an old friend and the evening with two more old friends, all of whom you love more than life itself.
So, now you’re caught up, and I’m back and this week is looking less busy.
And, if I know the way things go around here, there will be plenty to share!
August 13, 2010
Ode to the Cardboard Box
Oh, cardboard box.
How much you thrill my children.
Your possibilities are endless.
In a house full of toys, you eclipse them all.
You are a clubhouse,
A nap room,
A reading nook,
A hiding place.
Good job, little friend.
Good job.
