Is it possible that in the course of 15 weeks, Tiny Monkey has gone from this
to this?
June 4, 2011
June 3, 2011
Friday Five
Wanna just write? Without wondering if it’s just right?
The Friday Five is taken from The Gypsy Mama. 5 minutes of pure, unadulterated writing.
Today’s topic is:
Every Day
Every day I get a million things done and put off the laundry. Every day, I say to myself, “You gotta do the laundry or it’s going to pile up and up and up until it’s more than you can handle.” Every day I say that and then I let it wait until the next day anyway.
Every day I wonder if I’m the only one who rethinks conversations they’ve had and wonder if they sounded as stupid as they think they sounded.
Every day, I am grateful for what I have and wish I was doing more for those who have less. Every day I think this and then I think that wishes aren’t actions and I need to quit wishing and start doing.
Every day
Stop
June 2, 2011
Favorite Times
My favorite time of day is my morning shower.
The kids haven’t woken, yet, Real Man is exercising, and it’s just the shower walls and me.
As I stand there, slowly waking, I think about everything and nothing. I just relax and let the moment be, because I know that the minute I emerge, it is as if some house-wide alarm clock has gone off and everyone wakes and stumbles down the stairs, looking for me and wanting to know what I can do for them at that moment.
My favorite time of day is standing in the hall as the students come in to the building.
As a parent and a teacher, every day has to be brand new.
Every kid needs a fresh start with each new day.
You need to let go of whatever happened the day before and be willing to be as excited to see them as you were on the first day you saw them.
It’s what kids of all ages need.
Some come in half-asleep, some chattering away.
Some come in with their noses in books, bumping into everyone and everything as they make their way down the hallway using every other sense but sight.
Almost all of them will say “Good Morning” with a smile, which is no small feat for a building that houses over 1,000 6th, 7th, and 8th graders.
It’s the signaling that a new day has begun and it’s full of possibility for us all.
My favorite time of day is when the monkeys all get home from school or daycare.
When I pick up Tiny Monkey, he just smiles and giggles and is so happy to see me.
There are no tearstains, no residual crying-hiccups, or anything to indicate that he’s had a tough day.
In fact, he seems to be having a delightful time at daycare, which makes me all the happier when I pick him up.
It’s like his life is just laughter and smiles all day and when I get him, we get to continue the love.
When I pick up Baby Monkey, he drops what he’s doing and runs across the room to give me a big, squeezy hug.
Then, it’s just chatter, chatter, chatter in the car, as he tells me about his day. Good stuff.
When the bus drops off Monkey in the Middle, he races for the house, and I’m just so thrilled to see him.
He gets taller every day while he’s at school, and I swear he changes in the 8 hours we are away from each other.
And, finally, when Monkey Girl comes home, she flops onto the couch next to me and I love to listen to her tell me about her day. The drama that comes with being 10. Wanting to be so big, and yet still desperately clinging to being a little girl. Makes my heart burst.
My favorite time of day is feeding Tiny Monkey before bedtime.
He snuggles in against me as he eats.
One hand wraps around my back and gently opens and closes, like he’s rubbing my back in time with my hands rubbing his arms and legs.
As I look at him, his eyes are closed, but every now and then they open, and as we make eye contact, he can’t help but smile and lose his grip on his snack.
We smile at each other, like two fools in love, until he remembers what he was doing and waggles his head around until he is back in place to resume his greedy little suckling.
I love how he falls asleep as he eats, laying perfectly still, until he is jiggled or breathed on, and then his little mouth works, chin opening a closing once, twice, three times, and then is still, as if he is trying to trick me into thinking he is awake.
I love the rise and fall of his chest as he sighs and breathes against me, and the way his hair softly falls back into place as I run my fingers through it.
I mourn the fact that the little body that once fit completely against my body now has sprouted legs that fall off of my lap. He’s supposed to be tiny…how is it possible that he is this long?
My favorite time of day is when I put Tiny Monkey in his crib.
I lean down and kiss his sweet head and watch for the rise and fall of his chest.
Then I creep into his brothers rooms and kiss their sweaty little heads and whisper “I love you,” as they sleep, so differently; Monkey in the Middle, sprawled across his bed, sideways, backwards, upside down, while Baby Monkey is under every cover he can find, no matter the temperature, and his face buried in his blue blankie.
Finally, I tip-toe to Monkey Girl’s room and no matter what time it is, my gentle kiss wakes her, and she groggily reaches out for one more hug as she whispers “Love you, Mommy,” and my life is complete.
My favorite time of day is when the house is quiet and Real Man and I get a moment to ourselves.
We snuggle up and talk and laugh and enjoy spending time with our very best friend.
Despite my best efforts, I begin to fall asleep and Real Man whispers, “Take off your glasses,” and I say “But, I’m not sleeping,” and he laughs.
Every night.
And life is good.
May 29, 2011
One Hell of a Week
Haven’t written in a week.
Here’s why:
Sunday
Baby Monkey’s long-awaited 5th birthday party.
SuperHero Themed.
Monday
Real Man took the day off and we went to the Mother/Father celebration at Monkey in the Middle’s school.
There were happy tears for his great performance and sad tears as we dropped the baby at daycare for the first time.
We also took Baby Monkey to the diner for lunch after the show.
Tuesday
I went back to work.
It was great to be back and Tiny Monkey seems to be enjoying his time with the woman who is watching him.
Wednesday
I’ve downloaded the Hipstamatic app for my iPhone and am loving it!
Thursday
We got to see Monkey Girl as Mrs. Potts in her 4th grade production of Beauty and the Beast.
So ridiculously proud of her.
Friday
I had professional development at work, and afterwards, Tiny Monkey went for a swing!
Saturday
We hit the diner before the Memorial Day Parade, then headed over to the parade.
Burgers and dogs for dinner and then it was definitely a Dairy Queen type of night!
Sunday
And now we’re back at Sunday.
It was one hell of a week, in a very good way, and now we begin the next week.
Now that I have a week of back to work under my belt, I think I can definitely get back to my regularly scheduled programming here, at the blog.
Hope you all had a great week as well!
May 20, 2011
Best of Both Worlds
I go back to work in a few days.
It’s been hard to think about, because I don’t want to leave Tiny Monkey.
He’s going to be with a wonderful caregiver and will be less than a minute drive away from where I teach.
But, he’s tiny.
And he’s my monkey.
So, I’ve been feeling low.
Then, yesterday, something happened.
My eighth graders went to DC.
And I found myself wishing that I was with them.
I was texting with some of my teacher friends and suddenly everything I love about my career came rushing back to me.
The students, the content, the discovery, my friends, the students.
Making a difference.
And while it doesn’t mean that I’m going to miss Tiny Monkey any less, or that there won’t be plenty of tears (from me) next week, I’m getting excited to go back.
It’s suddenly like the last week in August when I’m itching to get back and create new lessons and new ways for my students to learn.
So, this morning, I tried on my work clothes and some of them actually fit, and I’m wearing my heels around the house today so my feet are ready.
Because I had forgotten that I can be both.
That I am both.
A Mama who loves her babies beyond all reason or measure.
And.
A teacher who loves what she does and the adults and kids with whom she does it.
I guess I had forgotten that I’m a working Mama and it works well for us.
My babies are happy, their Mama is happy, and life is good.
May 19, 2011
Stuff We Used to Do
The other day, we were coming home from swimming lessons and we passed “The Abbey.”
In it’s day, it was just that. An Abbey where nuns lived.
Now, it’s an office building that is called “The Abbey.”
I remember when we were teenagers, we would always beep as we passed the building for good luck.
Why?
I have no idea.
Someone once said it was so the nuns would pray for us, and I used to imagine a nun in the middle of painting some beautiful artwork and then some idiot beeping as they pass, startling her and her brushstroke going awry.
I then imagined her saying “I got a prayer for you, a$$hole!” and having to fix the error in the art.
However, passing The Abbey made me think of all the other things we did as teenagers, in the car, for luck, and how incredibly ridiculous they were.
I’m sure you all played “Punchbuggy” when you saw a Volkswagen Beetle.
I thank God my kids don’t know that game. Otherwise, they’d be in a world of hurt on a fairly regular basis as both of my parents drive Beetles.
But, did you ever:
Pick up your feet when going over train tracks?
Scratch the ceiling of your car when going through a yellow light? (Yeah, yeah…should have slowed down, not sped up to get through the yellow, I know, I know…)
Because I did, and interestingly enough, at 39, every now and then, I reflexively start to do these things without even thinking.
Not every time, but once in awhile, I find myself lifting my feet as I cross the tracks or catching my arm as it raises to scratch the ceiling as I pass through the yellow (not with the kids in the car…of course…nope, no siree…never catch me doing that…nope…uh-huh.)
Funny how these things, which are just silly things to do as a teenager, actually scratch a groove in your brain like that on a record, and when you least expect it, the needle jumps right back into the groove.
I’d love to hear any weird superstitions you may have had as a teenager in a car, because I’m sure there are few I’ve missed!
May 17, 2011
Nature Gone Wild
So, I’ve noticed, lately, that nature has gone wild.
I don’t mean that we have bears breaking down our door, however, the nature in our area has been increasingly encroaching on our space.
Now, let me just say that I realize that we, as humans, have taken over their living space in major, major ways. I’m an animal lover and am all about nature and animal life.
Just not in my space.
I know we’re the big bad in the story of life on Earth, but it seems as though they are either revolting or have decided to just throw in the towel and give up on their own lives.
Two birds flew into our windows in two days. Weird.
Birds seem to be divebombing our windshields as we drive. It’s like they no longer avoid moving cars or don’t seem to realize the cars are there.
Chipmunks, who used to quickly scurry out of the way of cars, or who just stayed off the freaking roads to begin with, have suddenly begun to just sit in the middle of the road and watch my car coming, leaving me either swerving to avoid them or holding my breath until I’m over them, because I was too close to swerve.
The raccoons have stopped just knocking over our full garbage bins, but now knock around the empty ones, too, as if to say, “Hey suckers…wanna make something of it?”
Squirrels are a little too close to my front door when I’m walking in and out and I fully expect to find deer on the deck when I go into the kitchen for breakfast.
Anyone else notice that nature is getting a little too close for comfort these days, or have Real Man and I done something to offend the birds and the bees and they are now getting their revenge?
May 16, 2011
Monday Musings
Do babies even feel the drool on their chins? They never try to wipe it away, and I can’t help but wonder if they even know it’s there or if it’s one of those things where we don’t know it shouldn’t be there until someone tells us so.
What is it about the rain that makes everyone sleepy? Is it because we know we can’t actively play outdoors so our subconscious says “Screw it…let’s just shut down for the day”? Or, is there some deeper, physiological reason?
What’s with the whole vampire craze? (and please know that I am including myself in this) Twilight, the Vampire Diaries…why are they such a big hit, and don’t tell me it’s the excellent writing and acting, cuz I’m addicted to these and I know that ain’t it folks. Is it the immortality? The super speed? What’s up with the vamps?
Did I dream it, or for a few weeks there, was Charlie Sheen the biggest star in the world?
What’s up with Angry Birds? I’m not sure I get the lure.
Why does your hair not hurt when you are brushing out your own knots, but when someone else tries to brush them out, it feels like you’re being murdered? If you were ever a little girl, you know what I mean.
Why does tweezing my eyebrows always make me sneeze?
Why did they have to “update” Weebles? The old ones were way cooler than the upgrades.
May 13, 2011
this moment
{this moment} – A Friday ritual. A single photo – capturing a moment. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.
If you’re inspired to do the same, leave a link to your ‘moment’ in the comments for all to find and see. Inspired by Soule Mama’s blog. (link found on the right hand side of my page)
Photo courtesy of Rebecca Mancini
