My Real Life

So, I was in the laundry room the other day.

Doing laundry.

As I am doing with almost every waking moment of my life.

As I pulled out, yet another, item from someone’s pocket and put it on the windowsill where I put all my laundry treasures, I thought, “You know, Amy…you should blog about this.  About your laundry treasures.  Because everyone out in the world wide web world has been dying to see what you find in the laundry.  I just know it.”

Thus, this post was born.

Here is the windowsill where I put my laundry treasures.

I line them up and if anyone wants to come and claim them, they are more than welcome to do so.

Otherwise, out they go.

If it meant so little to you that you couldn’t be bothered to remember it was in your pocket when you took off your pants, I’m not hunting you down to tell you I found it.

Item #1:

This came from the pocket of Monkey Girl.

I don’t know why she took it off, but I’m imagining a moment in school, where her teacher said, “Monkey Girl…if that ring is going to continue to distract you, maybe you should take it off.”

Off it went, into the pocket, and out of sight, out of mind.

If memory serves, there will be a million more of these little, adjustable rings to come into my house before she graduates from high school.

One in the trash isn’t going to kill her.

Item #2:

Also from the pockets of Monkey Girl.

Luckily, I pulled this out BEFORE it went through the dryer.

There is always a tube of lip balm on the windowsill in the laundry room.

My girl has gorgeous, Angelina Jolie lips.

If she doesn’t keep them well covered in lip balm, she gets very uncomfortable.

She complains about those lips being too big and we keep telling her that women shoot toxins into their lips to get the look she has naturally.

To that, she just says, “Gross.”

Item #3:

I’m not sure what this was.

I had never seen it before.

I’m not sure whose pockets it came from.

I’m guessing one of the boys.

It made it through the washer and the dryer.

I pulled it out, played with it a little, and tossed it.

Item #4:

Believe it or not, we have a dice collection.

Big dice, small dice, strangely shaped dice, bronze dice, etc.

Found this in the dryer, also.

Added it to the collection.

Item #5:

Um…this came out of my pocket.

So, I put it in my wallet.

Other people’s money goes in my wallet, too.

You do the laundry, you reap the rewards.

Now, there is also this bag in the laundry room.

Do you know what this bag is?

Can you guess?

Unmatched socks.

I have at least one sock to add to the bag every single time I do the laundry.

Then, when the bag is full, I pay Monkey Girl $5 to make any matches she can.

She takes an hour, dumps the bag, and makes matches.

5 matches later, she’s done, and the other hundred mismatched socks go back in the bag.

I don’t want to talk about it.
So, those are my observations from the laundry room.

Don’t worry…I’m not going to make this a regular post.

I think.