Connoisseur. The word brings to mind fine wines, cigars, gourmet foods…you know. The finer things in life.
However, one of the actual definitions of “connoisseur” is “a discerning judge in the best of any field.”
So, today, I would like to offer up our family’s area of expertise. We are connoisseurs of the park.
That’s right. We make it our mission to play on every piece of play equipment in the county. If it hasn’t been climbed on, swung on, slid down, or jumped on my my monkeys, then quite frankly, it ain’t all that.
To our minds, parks must have certain elements in order to make the cut to be on the monkey’s list.
1.) A park must have more than one slide and at least one of the slides must be different; whether it twists or has bumps or is through a tunnel.
Case in point:
This is currently the park that is tied for first place in the monkey’s expert opinions.
Note the abundance of slides. Also note how none of them are your garden variety, straight down at an angle that almost makes it impossible for you to actually go anywhere, particularly if your skin is touching the slide, slide. They are side-by-side, twisty, and the one in the back has some bumpy things on it. (Ouch!)
A good park must also have good climbing material. Rock walls are big winners, but if there are bars to climb, that’s acceptable as well.
Here’s a closer shot of the “rocky mountain” at the park pictured above. Big fun.
Suspension bridges are also pretty cool.
Hard for adults to imagine, but apparently, running as fast as you can across the bridge while your brother or sister tries to stand still and not fall off the bridge is something that can inspire many belly laughs. Try it sometime.
Even if the park is not so impressive, it’s value jumps by having three items:
1) Ruins of an historical building that they can either climb on or be photographed beneath.
2) A waterfall that used to power a mill.
3) A “secret” path that leads you to another park.
(*Note the sibling hand-holding. They got so excited to see this new park at the end of the trail, they grabbed each others hands and started running.)
However, at the end of a long day, sometimes just visiting the park at the end of your street will make you just as happy as a fancy park. Four swings, one slide, two climbers and a set of stairs.
Sometimes even connoisseurs like a hot dog and a beer.