My Real Life

December 17, 2011

The Elephant in the Room

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 8:14 am
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During my 20 minute lunch, I will often call Real Man, just to check in and chat.

I miss that guy during the day.

So, on Friday, I called during lunch and we chatted for a bit.

I said, “The Smurfs” is coming from Netflix today.  I say we call a family movie night and snuggle up and watch with the kids.  They’ve been dying, waiting for it to come.”

Real Man said, “Will we watch the movie before or after you make the gingerbread house with the kids?”

Silence on my end of the phone.

See, some people have the elephant in the room.

Our family has the unopened Gingerbread House kit in the room.

A few years ago, while in the grocery store, the kids asked if we could get a gingerbread house kit.

I said sure, instantly creating warm, fuzzy images in my head of the kids and I, hovering over the kitchen table, laughing and loving as we made a gingerbread house together.

Then, when it was done, it would be all we could do to not begin to eat and destroy it immediately.

Ah, what fun we’d have.

We put the box in the cart and headed home.

However, every time I’d look at that box in the pantry, the warm visions I’d had at the store would be pushed out of the way with new visions of pushing and shoving and kids yelling “Hey!  It’s my turn!  Move!  You’re in my way!  I want to put the red candy on!” and I’d find a reason why we just couldn’t put together the gingerbread house today.

That gingerbread house sat in my pantry for three years.

Every holiday season, the kids would ask to make the house and every year, I’d put them off with “Another day, another time,” while thinking in my head, “Another year.”

When we moved in July, I saw my chance.

While packing up the pantry, I took that box and tossed it in the trash.

There were no kids around to witness it, and it felt so liberating to get that sugary monkey off my back.

I had, quite frankly, forgotten all about the gingerbread house until last weekend, when Monkey Girl and I went to Walmart to get a gift for a friend.

As we passed the Christmas aisle, she turned to me and said, “Oh Mommy…please can we get a gingerbread house?  And MAKE it?”

And there I was, once again, filled with visions of happy children, squealing with delight as I put a dollop of icing on each of their noses, Christmas carols playing sweetly in the background.  The baby, giggling with glee as he watched the merriment from his high chair.

And I put the damn thing in the cart, came home and put it in the pantry.

Where it has been, since last weekend.

So, when Real Man threw down the gingerbread gauntlet on Friday afternoon, it was a challenge that had to be met.

Kids got off the bus on Friday and I said, “Does anyone have any plans this afternoon?”

They didn’t, so I said, “How about it we make our Gingerbread House and then have movie night with “The Smurfs?”

The screams of joy assuaged the small tic I had developed, just saying the words “Make the gingerbread house.”

And you know what?

It was fun.

We decided to scrap the directions and make our own design.

There was a little pushing and shoving, and a few “You put on more gumdrops than me!” but for the most part, it was fun.

A lot of fun.

It ain’t going on display at the Gingerbread Museum (I have a feeling it won’t last much longer than tomorrow night, anyway) but it’s a pretty darn good representation of what’s important to these monkeys.

And I love it.

December 16, 2011

Crazy Hair Day A.K.A. Tear My Hair Out Day

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 11:14 am
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It is Spirit Day, today, at the boys school.

And, in addition to just wearing your Spirit Day clothing, it’s Crazy Hair day.

Never a problem when Monkey Girl’s school has Crazy Hair day.

Her hair can be fairly crazy on a normal day.

However, I’ve got two boys with tight crew cuts.

Crazy Hair day and my boy’s hair doesn’t quite mix.

However, it’s been a few weeks since I last took the electric clippers to their hair, so we had a little to work with.

A little.

Last night, at dinner, Baby Monkey decided he wanted me to shave a mohawk in his hair.

It’s the best I could do with his hair as short as it was.

He had hoped for a crazy, punk-like mohawk, but based on the fact that he can’t stop looking at it in the mirror, I think he’s happy.

But then, he’s always happy.

So easy to please.

Then it was time to think about Monkey in the Middle.

He was NOT down with the mohawk.

He can barely tolerate a regular haircut.

A mid-season shave wasn’t going to happen.

So, we brainstormed.

He decided we should use hairspray and try to make it stick up as much as possible.

Great idea.

Except I don’t have hairspray.

I don’t have hairspray or mousse or gel or any other hair product, other than shampoo and conditioner.

And, apparently, this makes me mean.

Apparently, the reason I stopped using hair products, once I graduated from high school, is because someday, I knew I would have a 7 year old boy who would need hairspray for Crazy Hair day, and I wanted to be sure that he couldn’t participate.

Apparently, my lack of hairspray is a direct reflection of my lack of love for my 7 year old son.

Apparently, my low-maintenance cosmetic lifestyle means that I love one of my kids less than I love the other three.

At least, this is what Monkey in the Middle was telling me last night.

After some books and some cuddling, there were apologies (from him) and assurances that we’d figure something out (from me) and he slept.

Around 5:30 this morning, however, I woke to the uncanny feeling that someone was staring at me.

I opened my eyes to find Monkey in the Middle standing next to my side of the bed.

“So, what are we going to do with my hair?” he whispered.

And so it began again.

We tried using Monkey Girl’s detangler to see if it might dry hard and make his half a centimeter long strands of hair stand straight up, but to no avail.

By 6:00 am, I was online looking up homemade hairspray recipes and Googling things like “Will Jell-O powder stain the skin?” and “Food Coloring for Hair?”

We were both exasperated and frustrated and about ready to give up when I finally said, “How about stickers?”

He looked at me blankly.

“Why don’t we cover your hair in stickers?  That’s kinda crazy, right?”

He loved it.

The stickers took hold of those little strands of hair and held on strong.

And so, while it may not have been the craziest hair of the day, it made him feel like a part of it all.

And we’re good.

Until January.

December 15, 2011

Another Reminder

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 7:20 am
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I’ve said before that I completely realize the backwardness of drawing people to my blog, only to redirect them to another blog.

However, sometimes I read something that I just can’t help but share.

This is one of those times.

A colleague of mine posted a link to this guys website, and I just love, love, loved this particular post.

We’ve pared down Christmas considerably this year, and reading this post helped me to remember that I don’t need to feel guilty about that.

So, stop your shopping, because here are the 5 best toys of all time!

Enjoy!

December 14, 2011

How I Know

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 9:41 am
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It’s that time of year, again, when we all get the sniffles and coughs and regularly scheduled winter ailments.

However, for me, I’m never quite sure if it’s allergies or an actual cold.

I can guess, but I’m never really sure.

So, I take this medicine or that medicine until something takes and that’s how I diagnose…based on what works.

However, there is one surefire way for me to tell whether it’s allergies or a cold, and it’s by looking at my nightstand in the morning.

I’ve been under the weather for about a week, now.

I power through, but it’s starting to wear me down.

Yet, I haven’t known what to take (and can’t take much anyway, as I’m still nursing) so it persists.

This morning, however, I was able to make my diagnosis.

It’s a cold, verging on bronchitis.

Hmmm…what tipped me off?

See, I’m a sleep-medicator.

Some people sleepwalk, sleep-eat, sleep-lots of things.

Me?

I sleep-medicate.

Apparently, in the night, the coughing got so bad that it triggered my asthma, which caused me to, in my sleep, sit up and rifle through my nightstand drawer to find an inhaler.

And, apparently, the first one was empty.

So, I went for the second.

Which was also empty.

I must have finally found what I needed in the third, and went back to sleep.

I remember none of this.

This is why I don’t keep any other medications in my nightstand drawer.

I also think that I need to throw out those empty inhalers.

But that’s another post.

December 11, 2011

Labyrinth

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 7:39 pm
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We’ve found a new game in our house.

I got it at my church bazaar, back in October, but we didn’t bust it out to play until tonight.

Now, we’re wishing we hadn’t waited!

Monkey Girl and Monkey in the Middle just said it may have surpassed Clue as their favorites.

(Note:  Monkey in the Middle was clear that it does not surpass Chess, but it’s a close second.)

It’s called The aMAZEing Labyrinth and is made by Ravensburger Games.

It’s a puzzle game, which is always a winner around here, but it’s more than that.

There are stationary and then moveable maze pieces and you have to get all the treasures you pull from the pile, but the maze keeps changing on you and it’s fun and frustrating and a really good thinking game, at the same time.

So, if you are looking for one more gift, this holiday season, this one could be for you.

December 3, 2011

Done

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 7:55 am
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Have you seen the new Target commercial where people are preparing for the holidays and they keep saying “Done,” “Done,” “Done?”

All these people checking the next thing and the next thing off of their lists as they move toward the holidays?

That’s how I’m feeling about the passing of time, right now.

Like we’re wading through every 24 hours, and at the end of the day we just say “Done,” and move on to the next.

I think it is the danger of the holidays.

Early in the season, we begin marking time as we make our way closer and closer to whichever holiday it is that we celebrate.

We forget to slow down and enjoy this time and we certainly forget that time, once checked off our list, is gone forever.

It’s hard not to do this.

Even as I write this, I feel the burden of everything to be “Done” this weekend:

a trip to the Division of Motor Vehicles, Monkey Girl to voice lessons, two birthday parties for the boys to attend, church school for the monkeys, laundry for everyone, grocery shopping for the upcoming week, grading of student blogs, Christmas shopping to be done…

We all have similar tasks, and the mental checklist is hard to avoid.

So, my challenge to myself is to get the tasks “Done” but to slow down and enjoy each one.

To truly experience everything we are doing, and BE there…not mentally check it off and move to the next thing before it’s done.

To remember that, once it’s “Done,” it’s done and you can’t get that time back.

And time lost is the worst loss there is.

So, I hope you join me and that this holiday season can be different for you, than seasons before.

May we find ourselves at the end of the season not feeling like it has flown by and with little memory of exactly what we’ve done.

And may this be the slowest and most enjoyable holiday season you can remember in a long, long time.

November 30, 2011

What Was Old…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 2:14 pm
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…now is new!

The basement is finally complete, and we are enjoying moving all of the toys and related kids “stuff” back into the basement.

It’s nice to not be tripping over bins and boxes spread throughout the house as we worked on the basement.

I think the best thing about the basement being complete (after being gutted thanks to Hurricane Irene) is that the toys that were packed away during the renovation are now out again, and the kids are acting like they are brand new toys.

Cars that haven’t been played with in years are suddenly the coolest thing ever, and games and trucks that were long left and forgotten are once again basking in the glow of a child’s cherishing.

We’re not completely up and running, yet, but it’s good to know we’re on our way.

And, I think I might start a toy rotation, where I hide a few toys away every few months, then let them make a reappearance, much to the joy of the monkeys.

Feeling great about everything being back in it’s own space, once again!

 

November 27, 2011

Searching

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 9:46 am
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One of the features of WordPress is that, although I can’t see who comes to visit the blog, I can see what phrases people typed into search engines that got them here.  I realize that most of the people weren’t actually searching for my blog, but when they searched, they clicked the link and came to visit.

I always get a kick out of the things people searched for and can’t help wondering, sometimes, what exactly they hoped to find.

Some are pretty straightforward:

“Amy Bozza”

I’m guessing that person was looking for me, but I’ve googled myself and there is also an Amy Bozza who participated in a marathon somewhere called Spring Lake, and I’m sure there are many more of us, worldwide, so I won’t be so self-important to assume it was me they were looking for.

“saddle shoes”

Probably looking for some cute shoes and came across last week’s Five Question Friday about what outfit from the past I wish I could wear.

“Eddie Rabbit”

Love that someone typed in “Eddie Rabbit” and they came to my blog.

If he was still alive, he could have googled himself and came here!

Or not.

“monkey amy love”

Hmmm…starts to get interesting here.

A girl named Amy who loves monkeys?

Someone who loves a monkey named Amy?

This blog?

Hard to tell, hard to tell.

“girl smiling with braces and one leg”

Okay.

Not sure how this led them here, but it’s an interesting thing to search for, nonetheless.

“Alicia Bridges accent”

Love this one, and Erin knows why.

And here are some others that make me giggle, smile and sometimes wonder “What the heck?”

“Pork chops and applesauce, ain’t that swell?”

“Handcuff nurse”

“Zasto va golim”, which is, apparently, Serbian for “Why I Love Him” which, in Serbian has been searched for 3 times to get someone here and 53 times in English.

“Full Diapers”

“I am a glutton for the cane”

“Microwave phrases”

“Took an old thumb”

“Toilets Home Depot”

And, my favorite…

“قلم” (which, apparently, means “fountain pen”)

November 20, 2011

Satellite Radio

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 10:15 pm
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Real Man has Sirius Satellite Radio in his Jeep and I gotta tell ya, I’m hooked.

I enjoy scrolling through all of the channels, but I especially love the channels based on certain decades.  They only go back as far as the ’40’s but I actually spend quite a bit of time listening to that as well as everything on up through the ’90’s.

The thing I enjoy about the decade channels is that they don’t just play the most popular music of the decade.

They play all the music of the decade.

I’m hearing songs that I had completely forgotten about and they make me smile and sing at the top of my lungs.

Okay, any music makes me sing at the top of my lungs, but you get the picture.

You get a much fuller view of the decade by listening to it on satellite radio because it’s all there.

I had forgotten how many songs in the ’80’s had the “talking” in them.

Not rap, per se, but just strange sections where the singers started to talk.

Hysterical.

I love it.

So, for now, I’ll leave you with this little ditty by Oran Juice Jones.

Oh yeah, that’s his name.

Anyone remember this one?

(You gotta be in it for the long haul to get to the talking but it is so worth it!)

(And the video is 100% 1980’s.)

November 19, 2011

Another Saturday Night…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 10:10 pm
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…yet, unlike the song, I got lotsa somebody’s.

Four little ones and a big one.

Still, gotta love that song.

As usual, before I even start, I digress…

It was a good day around here.

Lots of family things to get done, and then my colleagues from the school musical came over and (after holding auditions this past week) we cast the play.

It went smoothly and I think everyone left happy.

We finished around dinner time, and I realized I hadn’t planned for dinner.  Had nothing defrosting, and as I looked through the pantry and fridge, I realized that, much like Old Mother Hubbard, our cupboards were bare.

So, since we’ve not been out in awhile, I proposed to Real Man that we treat the kids.

We got in the car and headed to Wendy’s.

We had to make a quick stop on the way there, to pick up some food that I needed to send into church with Monkey Girl tomorrow.

Since Stop-n-Shop was on the way, we stopped there.  I’ve been in there only one other time, and we were only there to pick up a floral arrangement, which we got right at the entrance.

I never actually walked through the store.

Tonight, however, I had to get to the dairy aisle, which took me all the way through the store.

I can’t go back.

Too.  Many.  Things.  For.  Me.  To.  Buy.

Food, books, movies, everything.

I managed to get in and out with just what I went in for.

Well, and a tray of brownies because they just looked so good.

But that’s beside the point.

So, we get to Wendy’s and as soon as we walk in, I’m struck silly because the guy behind the counter is wearing a chic, fancy Burberry type surgical mask.

Huh?

Real Man and I couldn’t look at each other because we had a case of the giggles (okay, Real Man doesn’t giggle, but you know what I mean).

The scary part was that we weren’t sure if he was afraid of being infected by us or if he was afraid that he was going to infect the food.

The latter, we chose not to think about.

Real Man pointed out that he didn’t wear gloves, so he was clearly afraid of something airborne, but not so worried about handling filthy money all day.

Anyway, we sat down and started to eat.

While we ate, the monkeys chatted away and it was just a nice meal.

I sat facing the window and I could see, reflected in the glass, an older gentleman, sitting alone, a few tables behind us.  He kept turning and looking at us.  Real Man gestured and mentioned it, as well.

Real Man also mentioned that the man was wearing two baseball caps.

One on top of the other.

Didn’t know that baseball caps could be worn in the layered look.

At one point, he got up and actually walked over to the table.

He said, “So, I see you are all eating potatoes.  Do you know where the first potato came from?”

After getting over our “Huh?” moment, the monkeys started trying to think of where the first potato came from.

He finally said “The ground.”

Kids thought it was hilarious, but laughed quiet nervous laughter.

I’ll be honest, I was getting a little nervous myself, but Real Man was there, and I had no doubt that no matter how this went, we were safe.

Then he asked how old the monkeys were and once we told him he nodded and said, “You know, this seems like a really happy family.  Just a happy, happy family.  It’s good to see.”

And he smiled and walked away.

Routine trips out are never boring for our family, so this was just another typical outing for us.

Shopping temptation, people in masks, joke telling, dual-cap wearing strangers approaching.

And a happy, happy family.

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