My Real Life

Let me begin by telling you that I fell in love with Les Miserables when we read it in eighth grade English.

The story utterly captured my imagination, my heart, my soul.

I knew, at 14, that this was a story that would stay with me forever.

And yet, I was fairly surprised when I heard that it had been made into a Broadway musical.

Such incredible sadness in this story.

Hard to imagine how they would put this story to music.

Genius.

I have seen Les Miserables on Broadway six times and have sobbed my way through every single show.

The story, the unbelievable music.

The unbelievable music and the voices that have brought it to life.

Another disclaimer…I’m a musical crier.

Just the right voice hitting just the right note.

Music swelling to reach the point of no return.

It makes my breath hitch in my chest and I can’t breathe for a few seconds.

I’ve been known to even cry while singing beautiful pieces in church, not at my own part in it, but in being a part of the whole.

So, as soon as the trailers started hitting the internet for the movie version of Les Miserables, (not the Liam Neeson, Geoffrey Rush version that came out a few years ago, although that was pretty good for a non-musical version of the story), I was very excited.

Then, I saw the trailer that showed that the actors were actually singing as they were being filmed and that was what was going in the movie.

I was blown away by the possibility.

It gave them freedom to really feel the songs as they went and guide the music to the emotion and play off of the other characters.

Brilliant.

Last night, Real Man and I finally got to the theater to see it.

We figured that, since it’s been out for two weeks, we’d be relatively alone in the theater.

We wound up in the 2nd row.

Definitely not alone.

However, I have never been in a quieter theater.

From the moment the first note was sung, the audience was completely silent.

I liked it.

I liked it a lot.

I thought Anne Hathaway was phenomenal.  Fantine was always one of my favorite characters and Anne Hathaway brought her to the screen perfectly.

I thought everyone else was also well-cast, and I loved the way some of the scenes were created to be expanded a bit to show things that you just can’t show on the stage.

Here’s what I missed.

The volume.

There is something about Broadway that utterly surrounds you with the music, and you just don’t get that in a theater.

And maybe it was the theater we were in, or maybe the good speakers were a few rows behind the second row, but I missed the volume.

When the music swelled, it didn’t really…swell.

When those beautiful voices were hitting those impossibly smooth notes, it didn’t quite hit my eardrums loudly enough.

“Do You Hear the People Sing” should be rocketing me out of my seat.

“One Day More” should make my skin wrinkle with goosebumps at the power of those voices coming together.

Yet, while the voices were all they could be and they were amazing, it just wasn’t loud enough for me.

It was almost like background.

And that took some of the enjoyment out of it for me.

When it eventually comes out on DVD, I’ll blast it.

Heck, maybe I’ll even buy surround sound just for that DVD, because that’s how this music is supposed to be heard.

But, even with that, the story remained the same.

It’s a story about loyalty, redemption, and the inherent goodness of people.

It’s about love.

It’s about friendship.

It’s about bravery.

There just isn’t a character in the story that you don’t want to embrace and say “It will be okay…I promise, it will.”

And for most of them, it isn’t okay, but then, there they all are at the end and suddenly, it is.

It is inspired and it reminds me, once again, that there is something inside all of us that strives for greatness and goodness, and if we go for it, we will be rewarded.

27 years ago, I encountered this story for the first time, and I have read it many, many times since then.

I have watched it live six times since then.

I have now watched it on film, and I have a feeling, I will do so many times again.

Victor Hugo…I wonder if he had any idea.

Lately, my kids (really only Monkey in the Middle and Monkey Girl) have gotten into “saving” their food and their drinks.

It came from the fact that when we would go out to dinner, Monkey Girl would always suck down her drink before her meal arrived and then would be upset that we wouldn’t let her get another drink except for water.

So, we would say, “Save your drink until your meal comes.”

Monkey in the Middle grabbed that and ran with it, always making sure he was the last one to finish his drink.

“Look guys,” he’d declare when Baby had taken his last sip.  “I still have a full glass!”

Then the others would be kicking themselves that they, too, didn’t still have a full glass of whatever it was they were drinking.

A little healthy sibling competition is not a bad thing.

However, it’s gotten a little out of control.

My Dad took us out to lunch at a local diner the other day and as we were putting our coats on, I realized that neither Monkey Girl nor Monkey in the Middle had even taken a sip out of their orange juice.

“You didn’t drink your orange juice!” I said.

“I didn’t want him to win,” Monkey Girl responded.

“Me neither,” Monkey in the Middle countered.

I made them guzzle it right then so it wasn’t a waste of my father’s money, but I realize it was getting out of hand.

Tiny, of course, has no clue what’s going on, and Baby Monkey stays true to himself and eats and drinks at his own pace, but the other two?

Savers.

I mean, I get it.

When I was a kid, my Mom used to always do that to my Dad and I.

We’d be sitting, eating Oreos and we’d each have three.

We’d chat and eat and my Dad and I would be done, and then boom, my Mom would have two more.  Turns out she had shuffled them off to the side where we hadn’t seen them and now we had to watch her eat hers and wish we still had ours.

We’d get ice cream pints and my Dad and I would eat ours in a reasonable amount of days and then, bam, my Mom would pull out an almost full pint and we’d have to watch her eat it, again.

(Yes, perhaps the Oreos and ice cream weren’t such good ideas anyway in light of the fact that my Dad and I later developing diabetes…anyway…)

So, I get it.

I do.

The other day, we were all sitting at the table, eating and I suddenly noticed that Monkey in the Middle wasn’t eating at all.

I said, “Aren’t you hungry?”

He replied, “I’m going to wait until everyone else is done.”

Weird.

Today is my birthday.

Today I’m 41.

I think it’s going to be a good year.

I decided that, today, I would try to come up with 3 (since my birthday is on the 3rd) things you don’t yet know about me.

Considering I’ve been writing this blog for three and a half years, I don’t know how easy it will be, but I’m going to try.

So, here we go:

1.  My two favorite classes in college were “Children’s Literature” and “The Old Testament.”

I took “Children’s Literature” one summer when I stayed on campus to make up some extra credits because I was doing a double-teachers certification program, both Elementary and Secondary Social Studies, and that meant extra classes and if I wanted to graduate in four years, it meant some summer classes.

So, I stayed in Ohio one summer, on campus, and took two classes…”Children’s Literature” and another one that I don’t remember.

It was a great class.

I spent my summer reading books like “Harriet the Spy” and “The Westing Game” which had already been favorites of mine as a kid.

I babysat for a family who lived near campus every day from 8-3, then I’d come back to the dorm and read until class, go to class, talk about the books, go eat dinner, go back to my room and read some more.

I know it’s not most college kids idea of a great summer, but it really was one of my favorite summers…ever.

“The Old Testament” was a class that was as straightforward as the name.

Now, not being a particularly religious girl, you may be surprised to hear that this was my favorite class, but it was.

Being a minister’s daughter, I know my Bible inside and out, so there were no new stories for me to hear from this class, but the discussion surrounding the readings were really fascinating.

It was another way of looking at the Bible and I was hooked.

I remember sitting in the laundry room with my roommate, DeeDee, highlighting the Bible for my homework, and getting different insight into the stories that it told.

I did not enjoy the class “The New Testament” nearly as much.

2.  I’m addicted to two reality shows.

I don’t really love reality television and don’t watch much of it.

I do watch “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette” but that’s about it.

I used to watch “Big Brother” but I got bored with it, as it just seemed like same stuff, different day.

However, I cannot stop watching “Hardcore Pawn” and “Oddities.”

“Hardcore Pawn” is a show about a pawn shop in Detroit.

I have always loved anything dealing with money with regards to saving money, making money, and selling things.

I worked in retail through high school and college and I loved it.

So, I’m a huge fan of “Hardcore Pawn” because it’s all about people coming in with their nonsense and selling it.

For the same reason, I love “Oddities.”

I recently discovered “Oddities.”  It’s about a store named “Obscura” in New York City that specializes in rare objects.

People come in and sell strange things and buy strange things, and the people on the show are just interesting people.

I have the DVR scheduled to record all new episodes of both of these shows, and when I can, I just sit and catch up on the episodes.

One day, I’d love to hit both of these stores…just ’cause.

3.  I want to be a foster home to children who need one.

This is my own desire that I have never actually discussed with Real Man, so this may come as a surprise to him when he reads it, but since he knows me so well, I have a feeling it won’t really be any sort of surprise at all.

Unfortunately, I know myself well enough to know that I don’t believe my heart could take it.

I had thought, years ago, about becoming one of the families that raise Seeing Eye puppies, but when I did the research, they were very clear on the fact that you are just getting to keep the puppy for a short period of time and then they would be leaving you.

It broke my heart.

And if I felt that way about having to give up a dog, I know how I feel about children in general, and I know that it would be impossible for me to let these children go, once their time with us was at an end.

I have a hard enough time letting my students go at the end of the year.

I think it takes a special kind of person to be a foster parent, and I truly wish I had it in me.

Also, I’m not sure how fair it would be to that child or to my children since there are already four children living in this house.

I fear that, with five children, no one would get the attention they deserve or need.

It’s part of the reason why I got my tubes tied after having Tiny.

But still…

I wish I could be that person because there are so very, very many children in need of good foster homes and I know there are so very, very many bad foster homes out there.

Good ones, too.  But, there are the bad ones and it just breaks my heart into a million pieces when I hear stories about the children who are placed in those homes.

I haven’t shut the door on this.

Maybe when the monkeys are grown and out of the house.

I don’t know.

—–

So, there you go.

Three things that you may not have known about me before today.

I hope you really didn’t know them and I hope that you found them at least a little interesting.

So, happy birthday to me, and I hope that you will celebrate my birthday by doing something special for yourself.

As for me, after work, I’ll be enjoying my Mom’s super spicy sauce with meatballs, sausage and spaghetti for dinner and not lifting a finger to prepare it.

Ahhh…

I love New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day.

I know I always say that Halloween is my favorite holiday, but I think it may actually be New Year’s.

I love the promise of a fresh start.

The idea that you can leave the past behind and start anew.

The belief that in this new year, there is the potential to do anything, be anything, accomplish anything.

Every year, I feel like I set New Year’s goals for myself and I do great until around March.

Then, life just gets in the way.

Normally, that’s fine, and I think it’s the way most of us deal with the resolutions for the New Year, as well.

However, 2012 ended with me being sick, exhausted, overwhelmed, and emotionally wrought, and I can’t let that happen again.

It’s bad for my family, it’s bad for my marriage, it’s bad for my career, and most importantly, it’s bad for me.

However, I don’t quite know how to approach the new year differently than I approach any new year.

I’ve created lists of tasks to complete in the new year.

I’ve created general goals that I want to meet by certain benchmarks in the new year.

I’ve followed calendars that give you day by day steps to a better you.

I’ve done it all.

So, I need something new for this year, because, apparently, everything I’ve tried in the past hasn’t worked.

In addition to my Twenty Wishes for 2013, I’ve decided to break my goals for 2013 into two categories:

Better Home & Better Health

Why these two categories?

Because I feel like these are two all-encompassing areas for the changes I want to make.  As long as I am pursuing something in either of these areas, every day, I’ll feel like a success.

I know that if I feel like I have to meet specific tasks each day, I won’t feel like a success, and let’s be honest…while success breeds success, failure also breeds failure.

Under the umbrella of “Better Home” is hammering out a new organization system for papers.  I feel like we are still drowning in piles, and the piles get moved around, but they never really seem to get any smaller.

Part of that is the reality of 4 children, three of whom bring home copious amounts of papers, every day, from school.  Part of that is a half-finished office that isn’t quite functional for me, yet.  Part of it is also no time to actually tackle the piles, and so they just keep growing, and I keep getting more and more tense as I look at them.

Also, under “Better Home” is dealing with laundry differently.  I must say, in a rare pat on my own back, I’ve actually gotten much better about dealing with laundry since we bought the new washer and dryer.  I’ve even gotten a little better about getting it put away as soon as it’s done.

Better.  Not perfect.

So, I need to come up with some sort of system or schedule for laundry.  Part of this will be Monkey Girl getting her laundry put away when it is done.  She does her own laundry, and hangs the hanging clothes as soon as they are done, but everything else gets shoved in a laundry basket, which she then lives out of for the week.  Drives me nuts.  So, yes, I could let this go and say “It’s her laundry” but I think it sets a bad example for the rest of us, so I’m going to help her get herself straightened out as I straighten the rest of us out.

There are other things under this umbrella, and as I move through the year, I’m sure I’ll discuss them.

For “Better Health,” I plan on working out some type of exercise schedule for myself and I need to work on cooking more healthy meals for us.  We eat dinner together every night, however, in busy times, I rely on pasta more than I should.  We are also a bit lax on the veggies, so I plan on attacking our meal plan in the new year, as well.  This may not go into effect until March, after the play is over, as rehearsals run until 5 in February, and I know myself enough to know I’m not going to be in any mood to cook fancy foods after a 5:00 rehearsal.

“Better Health” also includes some downtime for me.  Whether it takes the form of an hour, once a week, with no interruptions to write or read, or actually going somewhere, I realize that I need to listen to what people are telling me, which is I’m no good to anyone if I don’t take a bit of time to refresh.  I didn’t do this in 2012 and it resulted in my ending the year being sick, overtired, overstressed, and overwrought and it was bad.  Just bad.  So, I’ll be trying to carve out some time for just me in the new year, and I thank goodness that I have a supportive husband who is willing to help me find that time.

So, I don’t know what this is all going to look like or how it will all work out, but I have confidence that 2013 will be a better year than 2012 was, and overall, 2012 wasn’t too bad.

I’ll be starting a new page on the blog to track my progress, and I’m calling it “New Year, New Me,” which is incredibly cliché, but who cares?

So, feel free to hop on over there every now and then to see how I’m doing.  Feel free to call me on it if you don’t see frequent updates there, as well.  I can always use a kick in the butt!

Happy New Year to all of you and may the new year bring you succes, joy and love!

So, it’s New Year’s Eve and my guess is that many of you have plans to go out and celebrate with friends and family.

Us?

We have our own New Year’s tradition.

Every New Year’s Eve, we rent two movies…one for the kids and one for Real Man and I.

We get subs from the local QuikChek (hate that spelling) and something for the kids for dinner and a lot of snacks.

We watch the kid movie together in the living room, snuggled on the couch, then the monkeys go to the basement to watch kids television shows while Real Man and I watch our movie.

Then we bring the kids back up, watch some more television together while snacking and chatting and at 11:55 we wake Monkey in the Middle (who tries valiantly to stay up but never makes it…Monkey Girl and Baby Monkey are usually still going strong)…and, to be honest, sometimes they have to wake me up, and we watch the ball drop.

Then we all hit the hay.

Is it flashy? No.

Is it exciting?  To the monkeys, yes.

Yet, it is my favorite night of the year and my very favorite holiday tradition.

Seeing the old year out and the new year in as a family is exactly where I want to be.

I’ve been a member of the Frugal Village website since July 2001.

I started visiting the site when I was on maternity leave with Monkey Girl and then finally joined that summer.

Over time, the site owner, Sara Noel, made me a moderator who dealt mostly with the Home Organization threads in the Forums, and even though my attendance has been spotty in the past few years, she has allowed me to maintain that status. 🙂

I spend the majority of my time at the village reading and posting in the forums, but the entire site has wonderful articles and resources for people who are looking for ways to live more simply and frugally.

One of my favorite parts of the forums is the “Challenge” section.

People post yearly challenges for all types of things.

If you can think it up, there is probably a challenge for it at the village, and we use the threads there to hold ourselves accountable.

One of the challenges that I’ve decided to join for 2013 is the “Twenty Wishes” challenge.

The way the challenge works is like this: (and I’m just quoting directly from the 2013 challenge thread here)

The premise is simple, execution may not be! Make a list of twenty things you would like to accomplish in 2013. Your list may include self-improvement goals, decluttering, spiritual growth, finishing off those pesky UFOs (UnFinished Objects), remodeling projects, or whatever you would like to see completed by New Year’s Eve, 2013. Choose your list of items carefully. Don’t make it so difficult you can’t possibly complete the list, but do push yourself a bit to get through some things you may have been putting off.

I didn’t join in 2012, but I decided that 2013 might be a good year to join.

So, I came up with my list and entered it today.

Most of what I came up with goes along with my goals for the new year, (which I’ll be sharing on January 1st).

1. Take the family to DisneyWorld. We’ve been talking about doing this for quite awhile and just haven’t done it. I want this to be the year.
2. Get a playset for the backyard. I want the kids to play outside more, and I know my kids and a playset would definitely do it.
3. Get weight down by 9 pounds AND KEEP IT THERE. 
4. Incorporate more vegetables into the family diet.
5. Make $1,000 by selling on eBay.
6. Get blog readership to 200 per day average.
7. Make home office neat, organized, and functional.
8. Read 50 books (and keep track!)
9. Get pictures hung. We’ve been here a year and a half and haven’t hung up our pictures yet. Drives me nuts.
10. Have family photo taken.
11. Really go through my closet and be ruthless with getting rid of what I don’t wear.
12. Play piano at least once a week. I teach piano lessons, so I am always at the piano, but I rarely carve out the time to play for myself. I went to college as a vocal and piano performance major and I feel like I’m neglecting that part of myself.
13. Only eat out once a week, if at all.
14. Write in my journal more often. I only wrote in it twice in 2012, so anything would be an improvement! I think keeping the blog up every day takes it’s place, but they have different purposes and I don’t want to neglect my journal writing.
15. Really learn about self-publishing to see if it is an option for my novel.
16. Re-edit my novel.
17. Shred and pare down all of our files.
18. Sell the van.
19. Take more pictures.
20. Spend more time outside.

Some of the items are small, some are large, all are manageable, I believe.

Do any of you have a similar list?  Do you have any things you hope to have done by December 31, 2013 that you’d be willing to share?  I’d love to hear what you all will be working on in the new year!

I think my favorite part of Christmas, this year, was the fact that the kids made cards for everyone in the family, including each other.

They usually make cards for Real Man and I, but this year, they decided to each make a card for every single one of us.

I loved them.

They made me smile and laugh and just feel good.

So, I thought that I’d share some of my favorites with you.

They are my favorites for a lot of different reasons, but if nothing else, they are pretty darn cute.

Here are a few…

From Baby Monkey to me…”Mom I love you.  Thanks for the great year.” (Thanks for the great year…too funny.)

From Baby Monkey to the whole family…”Mom I love you.  You’re the best.  Dad you’re the Dad I love! Patrick I love you.  You’re fun.  Julia you’re the best and fun.  Michael you’re cute and fun.”

From Monkey in the Middle to Monkey Girl…”Julia, You are the best sister anyone could have.  Without you, I couldn’t do all the cool things you taught me.  I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.”

From Baby Monkey to Tiny…”Michael, You’re the best baby in the world.”

From Monkey Girl to Real Man…”Dear Dad, Merry Christmas! Thank you for all you do.  You are the best dad in the whole wide world!!!  I love you! Love, Julia  Dandy Awesome DaBomb!”

From Monkey in the Middle to Real Man…”Dear Dad, You are the best Dad ever.  I’m sorry for clogging the toilets all the time.  But, I wish you a merry, merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!” 🙂

From Monkey in the Middle to me…”Dear Mom, You are the best Mom anyone can have in the world!  I hope you have a merry Christmas and a happy New Year.  I hope you get what you want for Christmas.  Well, merry Christmas again.”  (Cracks me up that he ran out of things to say and just went to “Well, merry Christmas again.” 🙂 )

Then we had two drawings from Baby Monkey for Real Man and I.  His gift to us was to draw our portraits.  Love them.  Totally digging my awesome red jumpsuit and loving Real Man’s rainbow inspired get-up.

Right now…

Right now is when I get hit by the Christmas spirit.

It seems to elude me as we move toward Christmas.

When you are a child, you spend your time waiting for Christmas, and that anticipation makes it seem so magical.

When you are an adult, you spend your time preparing for Christmas, and that work can be exhausting.

Yet, in the quiet of the night when all the presents are wrapped and the stockings are filled…the house is quiet.

In that quiet, I find myself anticipating, once again.  

Anticipating the pitter-patter of excited little feet rushing down the stairs in the morning, and the squeals of excitement before they run back up the stairs to wake us.

And just like that…the magic is restored.

Whether you are celebrating Christmas today, or not, may today be full of love, joy, and magic.

There’s just something about Baby Monkey.

I’ve never met anyone as completely comfortable with himself as he.

I’ve also never met anyone who can entertain themselves as fully and for as long as he can.

One day, you walk into the kitchen and he’s doing this:

(Why he’s wearing his jacket, I don’t know…he and Monkey in the Middle never take their jackets off when they come home from places.)

Scissors, tape, pens, paper…creating something that will wind up being taped to a wall somewhere in our home.

The next day, you walk into the living room and he’s doing this:

Confiscating items from our the house to create a reflective light tunnel.

Why?

Because he can.

He doesn’t necessarily enjoy being the center of attention, but when he knows it’s inevitable, he makes the best of it.

Like wearing his brothers suit to his choral concert, even though it was a bit too big, because he wanted to look “extra fancy.”

Yep…there’s just something about this guy, and maybe it’s the fact that he keeps the real him hidden in public and only shares himself with us.  Like we’re all in on this little secret of his utter and complete awesomeness.

I don’t know, but I can tell you that if there are any guarantees of kids on the nice list, this guy is at the top.