Rule #1: Don’t tell any of your children that the flu shots are coming. Because, you may think that it’s okay to tell your oldest, most responsible child. Yet, the truth is, because she is so responsible, she will think it is her job to prepare her younger brothers for their flu shots, a week ahead of time, thus giving your middle child a week to perseverate and build his anxiety.
Rule #2: Do not schedule your flu shots on the same night as football practice. Even if you can make it to half of the practice, odds are, you are going to have to pull him from practice while he’s on a successful streak and getting compliments from the coach like, “…and our all-star quarterback…” Oops, time to go honey.
Rule #3: If your children stop mentioning the flu shots for a day or two, don’t assume that they’ve made their peace with the shots and are just being mature and ready for the shots. Odds are, they’ve actually forgotten for a moment, and the worst possible thing you could do would be to say, on your way out the door to football practice, “Let’s go! We don’t want to be late for practice, especially since we need to leave early for shots!” This would probably lead to a round of crying and hysteria about “Does it hurt? How big is the needle? I don’t want to leave football practice! Mom! He pinched me! I just wanted to show him how much it would hurt!” while your older, responsible child, who started it all in the first place, a week ago, will just continue to read her book as she walks out to the car, completely oblivious of the little boys melting into little puddles of tears in the foyer.
Rule #4: Even if all of these things happen, and somehow, you get to football practice on time, get the boy to leave football practice early, actually get to the doctor appointment with a few minutes to spare…well, let’s just say that you should probably check your appointment card twice to make sure you have the right Wednesday night and that you are truly supposed to be getting your shots THAT night and not the next Wednesday night, when you can’t go anyway, because it is your middle child’s Back-to-School Night, so you need to call to reschedule.
If you can follow all those rules, getting your flu shots this year should be a breeze.
