My Real Life

I love this picture. 

I love this picture for two reasons.

1)      It is a picture of Monkey in the Middle and I love that kid.

2)      It shows the dichotomy that is Monkey in the Middle, and it reminds me that you can’t put people in a neat little box and label them. 

Look again.

Here he is.  A five-year old boy.

On the one hand, he is setting up the board after beating one of his grandpas at chess this morning.  He loves chess.  He just loves this game. 

My Dad will tell me that Monkey in the Middle sees moves way before they are made and when he gets my Dad in check he’ll say things like “Didn’t you see that Bishop, Grandpa?”  To which my chagrined father responds, “No, little guy.  I guess I didn’t.”

Because, my Dad plays to win.  As do I.  We aren’t proponents of letting kids win to build their self-esteem.  It’s false esteem at that point.  Let’s be clear, we also aren’t yelling “In your face!” if we win.  We make all kinds of suggestions and help guide them to improve their game play.  The result?  A five year old who beat his seventy five year old Grandpa at chess on Monday morning.

But, I digress.  My point is that this is an intellectual little guy who plays a mean game of chess, which is a pretty intellectual game.  He’s a smart kid.

Now, look again.

Right next to that chess board is his football.  He’s set down his one love to play his other.  As soon as the game was over, the football was right back in his hand and he was running around the house, tossing it and chasing it, yelling “Touchdown!” and “Mom!  Watch this play!” as he threw himself after the ball, rolling as he caught it and holding it up in the air.  Let’s face it; he’s a jock.

So, who is he? 

The smart kid?

The jock?

He’s both.  He’s neither.   He’s Monkey in the Middle, and there are many sides to him, as there are to everyone.  Maybe dichotomy is the wrong word here, because we all have way more than two sides to us.  Isn’t it great?

So, again, call it what you will: not judging a book by its cover, don’t label people, you don’t know someone until you’ve walked a day in their shoes, etc.  Just watch yourself and be sure not to fall into those traps.

Because if you do, you could be missing out on some very interesting people.