My Real Life

December 29, 2010

What I’ll Miss

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 9:37 am
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As of yesterday, I am 30 weeks pregnant.

Given the measurements from the last ultrasound, I have about 8 more weeks to go.

With 8 weeks to go, it’s easy to get wrapped up in the small aches and pains and discomfort of late pregnancy.

It’s easy to grumble about the fact that I’ve gained almost 50 pounds and wonder how the heck I’ll ever lose them again.

It’s easy to bemoan the fact that I haven’t seen my feet in months and that I can no longer tie my own shoes.

Yet, I don’t want to.

I can’t complain about these things.

This pregnancy was such a gift and wonderful surprise, I want to revel in every second of it, particularly because this is the last one I’ll ever experience.

And so, I’m trying to focus on what I’m going to miss and the small wonders of being 30 weeks pregnant.

I’m going to miss the quiet, private conversations with my baby that I have throughout the day.  Others must think that I’m insane, always talking to myself, but the truth is, I keep up a constant narrative of what’s going on in my head with this little one.  He/she is definitely a captive audience, and I love sharing with him/her.

I also will miss the feedback that he/she gives me.  When I’m talking to him/her, there are always small movements that tell me that he/she is listening, and I pretend like the baby is responding, in the only way he/she can.

I’m going to miss the big, alien-like movements that occur at random times.  The baby is moving constantly, but every now and then he/she turns over or decides to kick-box with my abdomen, and it is the most out-of-this-world experience that cannot be matched.

I’m going to miss playing “Guess the body part” when I’m laying in bed at night and the baby shifts and there is suddenly a baby butt or knee or elbow or head making my stomach a misshapen mountain.

I’ll miss playing Patty-Cake with the baby.  He/she is incredibly responsive to touch, and so when he/she presses outward, I press back with my hand, and then he/she presses back and we can go back and forth for a few minutes.  I imagine that he/she is wondering “What the heck is pushing on me?” but I also imagine that he/she knows that Mommy is paying attention and always up for a game.

And, yes, I’ll miss not being able to bend over my belly to tie my shoes, because my belly is a constant reminder of the wonder of life, and who really needs to see their feet, anyway?

Nothing…nothing will match the joy of holding that baby in my arms in 8 weeks (or less), but I will certainly miss all of these small joys of pregnancy.  I know I will quickly forget the reflux, insomnia and discomfort, but these small wonders will stay with me forever.

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