My Real Life

June 25, 2014

I See You

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 6:00 am

Real Man lost 80 pounds over the past 12 months.

Let me say that again.

Since September, Real Man has lost 80 pounds.

The weight loss, itself, is not exactly what this post is about, but I’ll go ahead and answer the first question that everyone has when I tell them about it.

He did it through hard work.

He started with the Couch 2 5K app and could only manage to run 30 seconds at a time.

At first, it was difficult.

Really difficult.

But, if you know Real Man, you know that he doesn’t do anything halfway, and now my husband is a member of the running club at his work and is running in 5K’s once a month (in 21 minutes, no less) and runs 4-5 days a week, before work.

He has spreadsheets and websites and clocks his times and routes and pace and is, quite frankly, kicking ass.

He stopped eating in between meals, cut out soda, and makes good choices when he does eat.

So, again, I say, he did it through hard work.

Now that that is out of the way, let me tell you a story.

Like I said, he’s down 80 pounds.

He started at 260 and is now at 180.

Some people mention it, some people don’t.

But some of the people who do are starting to say things to him like, “Okay…that’s enough now.  I think you should stop.”

They say “You really shouldn’t lose any more weight.”

Or, “Any skinnier and you are going to look sick.”

The other night, Real Man was sharing one of these conversations with me and he said, “If everyone is so concerned about my health, why the hell didn’t they say ‘enough’ when I was 260?  Why wasn’t anyone telling me ‘I think you should stop’ when I was busting out of my clothes?  Where was everyone’s concern for my health then?”

He didn’t say this angrily.

He’s obviously appreciative of the friendlier comments.


Now, let’s be honest…

If someone had actually said that to him, he’d probably have been furious and deeply offended.

However, he has a point.

It’s a bad idea, in general, to ever comment on anyone’s weight.

Too heavy?  No one is going to say “Hey…slow down there, buddy.  You are heading toward a heart attack!”

Lost weight?  Many people would be reluctant to say “Hey!  You look great!” because they are afraid that there is the possibility that you’ve been struck with some type of awful disease.

And yet, maybe those are the things that we need to say to each other.

But maybe we need to say them a little differently.

“I see you.”

“I notice you.”

“I love you, but you don’t look like you are loving yourself.”

These are things that many of us desperately need to hear, but the rest of us just don’t know how to say.

But maybe it’s time we started trying.

June 23, 2014

Oh, Veronica

Filed under: Uncategorized — Amy @ 6:00 am

When I was a kid, my favorite book was Harriet the Spy.

I read that book so many times, I could probably have recited pages from it, on demand.

I owned an almost complete series of original, hardcover, Nancy Drews, that, to this day, I bitterly regret trading in for a complete set of Sweet Valley Highs.

I was glued to Scooby Doo, and was proud to solve the mystery as soon as the bad guy graced the screen, and Shawn Cassidy and Parker Stevenson, as Frank and Joe Hardy were my idea of perfection.

I dominated at the game Clue.

As an adult, I continued to gravitate toward mystery novels, loved trying to beat the cops in solving the crime on Law and Order, and was on the edge of my seat at every whodunnit thriller to grace the silver screen.

So, imagine my surprise when I was looking through Amazon Prime Instant Video, a few weeks ago, and stumbled across a show about a detective I hadn’t seen before.

I’ve got a bit of a “thing” for tv, particularly for tv shows that are geared for people in high school.

Can’t help myself.

So, my surprise was made greater when I realized it was about a girl, teenage detective.

Veronica Mars.

I started streaming it while on the treadmill and found that I lost track of time, (which was not a bad thing), completely caught up in the show.

The show began to dominate my thoughts.

I was/am addicted.

I even decided I needed to own a canvas bag like Veronica carries, because that’s how I roll.

For those who missed it, (like me), Veronica Mars is a junior in high school and her father is a private investigator.  She helps her father with different cases, but everyone in her school comes to her with their own mysteries to solve.  Predominant in the first season is the mystery of who killed her best friend, Lily.  The second season has another mystery that spans the episodes, and season three, yet another.

Love triangles, excellent dialogue…you’d expect that it was written by Joss Whedon, because it’s basically Buffy without the vampires.

I love it.

She’s smart, she’s sassy, she’s awesome.

Best show ever?

Probably not, but I am enjoying every second that I watch.

I’ve roped Monkey Girl in, after having the prerequisite conversations about “Don’t do as they do” because of the drinking and sex, but she gets why I love it, and she loves it, too.

There were only three seasons of the show, from 2004-2007, but a kickstarter campaign, begun by Kristen Bell (who plays Veronica) and Rob Thomas (the producer) a few years ago funded a movie that tied up loose ends and made the fans happy.

We are both partway through season 3, and because I’m already beginning to mourn the loss of the show, I’ve gotten a commitment from Monkey Girl that, once we finish season 3 and watch the movie, she’ll give Buffy a try.

Because you’ve gotta love a show about a smart girl who doesn’t take any crap from anyone and stands on her own two feet.

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